Commons Theater, A Production fresh out of College


Julian Wolfe
November 20th, 2011


Parliament Hill is illuminated at dusk on Nov. 17, 2011. - Parliament Hill is illuminated at dusk on Nov. 17, 2011. | Sean Kilpatrick/The Canadian Press
The NDP have added life to the House of Commons on Thursday as they exchanged an array of literature with their Conservative counterparts. After promising to make Ottawa a more civil place, senior NDP MP Pat Martin took it to himself to send F-bombs to all of his opponents and the junior elites have been suggesting books from the “For Dummies Series.”

 

If you missed the show, here’s how it went. Caution: The following remarks may remind you of your college days!

 

“Out of compassion for my fellow parliamentarians,” Natural Resources Minister (Team Conservative) Joe Oliver grumbled at the New Democrats, “I recommend the book called ‘Economics for Dummies.’ ”

 

“Mr. Speaker, since we are trading literary recommendations today, I hear there is a new publication called ‘Buying Jets for Dummies,’ ” Matthew Kellaway (Team NDP) smirked on the subject of the F-35 purchase. “Let me recommend that to the Associate Minister of National Defense (Julian Fantino from Team Conservative).”

 

“Mr. Speaker, maybe the honorable member could lend me his book,” Julian Fantino shot back. [Burn!!!]

 

“Mr. Speaker, since we are talking about books, I also have a book to recommend,” Francoise Boivin (Team NDP) said. “It is called ‘Democracy for Dummies.’ ”

 

Then John McCallum (Team Liberal) attacked Peter Van Loan (Team Conservative). “Does he want to borrow a book that I just acquired called ‘Flying Challenger Jets for Dummies?’ ”

 

So far the tally is Team Conservative: 2, Team NDP: 2, Team Liberal: 1.

 

Then came some more fireworks. As Team Conservative’s James Moore was about to bring the point for the home team, he added one clause that gave Team NDP the death grip that they wanted.

 

“Mr. Speaker, what an astonishing double standard by the NDP,” he gasped. “The President of the Treasury Board and the former minister of infrastructure appeared before a parliamentary committee and testified with regard to this matter. All the member for Peterborough is doing is saying that the CBC should be accountable before committee.”

 

This would have given Team Conservative the win, but he wasn’t finished yet!

 

“All we are saying,” he said, “is that the CBC should be elevated to the same level of accountability and responsibility as the President of the Treasury Board has already demonstrated.” [FAIL!!!]

 

From that point on, Team NDP had a field day.

 

Final Stats: Team NDP: 3, Team Conservative: 2, Team Liberal: 1.

 

All the while, the Liberals got their act to improve drinking water for Aboriginals passed and NDP Pat Martin dropped the F-bomb on Twitter! If you have young ones near you, cover their eyes!

 

 

"This is a f—— disgrace…closure again. And on the Budget! There’s not a democracy in the world that would tolerate this jackboot sh—," Pat Martin (Team NDP) tweeted. Martin has no intention of apologizing either.

 

But it didn’t end there! Followers who criticized the post either got "F— off" or "Eat my shorts."

 

"Nope. Not hacked. Just truly pissed off…you should have seen them last night laughing and joking in their smug ignorance," he explained on Twitter, referring to Conservative MPs’ behavior in Commons.

 

He also refused to delete these tweets and all of the events that transpired that day prove that the NDP are uneducated and unprofessional. Welcome to Commons Theater, a Production fresh out of the College Dorm room.

 

Leader Turmel, who was like a mouse in all this, sent a statement to CTV saying:

 

"His language was not appropriate and could have been offensive to some," Turmel said in the statement. "That said, the Conservatives’ actions are not appropriate in a democracy and offensive to all Canadians."

 

After taking responsibility for her party’s actions, she played the blame game… Typical politics.

 

Final Score: Team NDP: 5, Team Conservative: 2, Team Liberal: 1. What a day it was. What ever happened to fixing Ottawa?

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   Categories: Conservative, NDP

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